* I Am My Own Grandpa
Many, many years ago when I was twenty-three,
I got married to a widow who was as pretty as could be.
This widow had a grown up daughter who had hair of red.
My father fell in love with her, and soon the pair were wed.
This made my dad my son in law, and changed my very life,
My daughter was my mother, for she was my father's wife.
To complicate the matters worse, although it brought me joy,
I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy.
My little baby then became a brother in law to dad,
And so became my uncle, though it made me very sad,
For if he was my uncle, then that also made him brother,
To the widow's grown up daughter who, of course was my stepmother.
Father's wife then had a son, who kept them on the run,
And he became my grandson for he was my daughter's son.
My wife is now my mother's mother, and it makes me very blue,
Because, although she is my wife, she is my grandma too.
If my wife is my grandmother, then I am her grandchild,
And every time I think of it, it drives me simply wild.
For now I have become the strangest case you ever saw
As the husband of my grandmother, I am my own Grandpa!